Sunday, June 27, 2010

Love, Sex or Fear?

Previously published in Myspace dated Sunday, March 25, 2007

I had a chat with a lovely lady friend. She had one of those things you keep deep inside you, something dark, and you can't just talk about it to anyone. So you'll keep it to yourself.

She had a friend during her university years. Her friend was beautiful and very smart. At that time, everyone will say that she will be a successful person with bright future.

Well... That was before she started going out with this young and handsome taxi driver. They were getting serious, until one day a lady barged into their classroom, shout her name, and gave her a big slap in her face in front of all her classmates.

That lady was that young and handsome taxi driver's wife...

And where was the hubby during that ordeal? He was driving taxi somewhere...

Did she broke up with him? Yes... for about a month. Then they started to get together again. All he did was to sweet talk her and promise whatever a man has to promise to get a girl's legs spread apart.

Not long after that, she started to cut classes. During semester break, instead of going back home, she'll spend time with the guy in chalet where that guy will bring food during meal time. All all they did was eat, shit, and sex.

Hmmmmmm... Love-birds, that what people call it these days, no? More like a sparrow and a vulture they were... So sweet....

I told my lady friend, that her friend was deeply fall in love with that guy. Sex made her too deep in love, and love made her unable to think straight. She will never listen to anyone. My lady friend just have to agree, because she had tried to talk to her friend, but her friend never listen..

Now, that lady at the age of 27, work as something that a UPSR graduates usually do, staying with that boyfriend without any wedlock, and have to endure daily beatings from her so-called lover. She has aborted at least twice.

She feels that she has nowhere to go but to stick with him. For what? Love? Sex? Or fear to be alone?

My lady friend told me that a good guy had proposed to take her as a lawfully wedded wife, but she rejected, cited that she has no feelings toward that good guy.

Fear of the unknown? Will it better to live in known shitty situation than to venture into the unknown? Changes need a huge courage in us as human. Only the strong-willed person will be brave enough to make a life affecting changes, no?

I put myself in her shoe. She had been robbed of all her strength, courage, hope and faith towards life ever since she was slapped in that classroom years ago. I'm not supprised that she can't change her life... She has no courage. She has been very weak to make any decision... Sigh...


  1. yeah... fear is such a powerful force within us... unfortunately, fear is actually nothing, does not even exist although it felt so huge inside us...


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